Friday, 6 May 2011

10 alternative uses for your shorthand book

Dawn Johnston, the name that fills every student journalist's heart with sorrow and dread. Countless hours spent slaving away in the attempt to make it to the, at the time, challenging speed of 60 words per minute, all to find out that to be accept by the journalism industry you have to squeeze another 40, if not another 60 words into that short length of time.

Well I'm saying NO MORE to those crazy little squiggles that have been the bane of my existence for too long, I'm standing up and sticking it to the Teeline man in the sky (or in our case woman).

Think of me as a 21st Century Jesus, minus the ability to grow such a glorious beard, and hopefully not destined to be nailed to a large wooden cross for an elongated, agonising death.

THR blends, vowel indicators and word groupings you have certainly met your MCH...

So goodbye sweet Teeline For Journalists, you have plagued my life for far too long. Now it's time, in true 90's style to 'get your own back' , as my personal hero David Benson-Phillips once proclaimed, with 10 alternative uses for your shorthand book:


1) Save yourself and friends from an apocalyptic zombie related scenario in which you would probably all end up eating one another...

2) Sometimes the most simple uses are the best door step, and


3) A way of propping up your trusty table


4) Frightening away little children

5) Honing your newly discovered cricket skills just in time for the 2013 Ashes series

6) Keeping warm on the long, shorthand-free nights

7) A pretty neat telescope

8) The worst Christmas anyone could ever have dream of receiving

9) Ran out of clean plates? Don't think so...


10) ...Failing that, Off Beat Earth have an even better idea for the little swine


Please note that no Alphabetties were hurt in the making of this Blog Post.

2 comments:

  1. Dawn (TFJ) Johnston6 July 2011 at 19:13

    I was laughing until I saw the alphabetti spaghetti, oh my poor book! Hope you did that after getting your 100 wpm - you'll regret it if you didn't and still want to be a journo. Go through that pain barrier - you know it makes sense!!!

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  2. Well it's a bit of an honour that you've replied to this post Dawn, not gonna lie I have been bragging a tiny bit to my friends. My poor shorthand book certainly has taken a beating but... erm... it deserved it? Poor excuse but it's the only one I can come up with. Currently I am at 60wpm so there's a little while before I've completed the NCTJ requirements of 100 and consider myself as a master of shorthand! You are right though as it will be worth it in the long run, but it certainly is a bit of a devil currently. Thank you for commenting Dawn, I feel quite privileged.

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